Showing posts with label snow days. Show all posts
Showing posts with label snow days. Show all posts

Wednesday, February 10, 2010


I think it's pretty safe to say that everyone in the world has a snow day today. Okay, maybe not everyone in the world, but if you live in the tri-state area or anywhere in the mid-Atlantic states, you are hopefully just getting up, sipping some coffee and reveling in your snow day. (Unless, of course, this is your billionth snow day THIS YEAR...If this is the case for you, sorry for the Snow Day Clusterf*ck because there is a point where snow days no longer warrant high fives, inside out pajamas and prayers before bedtime. At that point, enough is enough.)

Regardless - NEW YORK CITY PUBLIC SCHOOLS GOT A SNOW DAY, Y'ALL! We had ONE last year and that precious day was the first snow day called in FIVE YEARS! And don't be fooled, that doesn't mean NYC hasn't gotten heinous amounts of snow, it just means we, the teachers, have trudged to work in all sorts of conditions like we had taken the oath of the postal service or something.

But, NYC teachers just didn't 'get a snow day'.  They got a snow day that was called the DAY BEFORE! Which means there was time for extensive Snow Day Preparations. By Snow Day Preparations, you may think I'm referring to something involving the children, however, I'm not. I'm referring to a moment where a teacher can revel in indulging HERSELF or HIMSELF (for once) by going to the grocery store on the way home to buy delicious treats for the next day (picture grilled cheese for lunch, friends...and maybe some soup NOT from a can), renting copious amounts of movies (you know, all the ones we missed when they were in the theaters because we ritualistically drag home enormous piles of work that consume our free time),  turning OFF their alarm clocks and (gasp) perhaps choosing a book to read for pleasure.

The luxury!

Now I recognize that making the call to cancel school is a big decision. There are a ton of factors to consider, one of which is the infuriating fact that weather men (and women) love to hyper-predict storms of biblical proportions. Like a few weeks ago, when we were supposed to get DUMPED on and nothing happened. I actually had Snow Envy because I had worked myself up into a Snow Day Frenzy. I mean, one could conceivably declare a snow day and have no actual snow fall which then makes one look kind of like a douche, right? HOWEVER, this is not the ONLY way that the Keeper of the Snow Day can look like a flaming douche, friends. No, not at all.

Pause for a moment and remember this lovely moment brought to us by the NYC Department of Education just a mere year ago.

Setting: A snowy morning. 5 a.m. (Yes, 5 a.m.- that's when I had to get up.) Teachers all over the tri-state areas sit in the dark, squinting at the bottom of their TVs, waiting for their school's name or district to pop up on that oh-so-mystical scrolly thing. BECAUSE SEEING THE SNOW OUTSIDE THE WINDOW WAS NOT ENOUGH CONSIDERING WE HAD NOT HAD A SNOW DAY IN FIVE YEARS DESPITE COPIOUS AMOUNTS OF ACTUAL SNOW.

5:30 a.m. Nothing.
Me: (to my cat) Are you insane? It's like totally blizzarding out there.

5:35 a.m. Nothing.
Me: Crap. I have to get in the shower or I'm going to be late. This is ridiculous.
Turns off TV and goes upstairs.

6:05 a.m. Cell phone rings.
Me: (fully dressed and about to put on my coat...I can be fast when I want to be) Are you kidding me? We don't have school today? Are you SURE?

6:15 a.m. Back in bed.

That day, the day of the Late Snow Day Call, teachers and parents everywhere were furious because they had a) left for school already b) had no time to make other day care arrangements and c) HAD LEFT FOR SCHOOL ALREADY.

When the Keeper of The Snow Day was questioned as to why he waited so DAMN LONG to call the snow day despite the mountains of snow outside the window, he responded with something like this:

"If you looked out your window and saw all that snow and didn't think there was a snow day, I can't help you. And if you don't know the ways in which to find that type of information, maybe you NEED another day in school."

Oh no he di-in't!!

But yes he did. Don't believe me. Click here.  

Please keep in mind that there had not been a snow day for five years and, despite the fact that he said, "Snow day!" at 5:35 ish in the morning does not mean that the message was instantaneously delivered round the world or to people who were busy getting themselves or their children ready.

I mean, if that's not a way to win over the potential votes of parents and teachers everywhere, I don't know what is.

So enjoy today friends. Luxuriate in the early call, the turned off alarm clocks and the grilled cheeses of your day.

Monday, March 2, 2009

Stop Raining On My Snow Day Parade

I had a snow day today - me and every other teacher on the East Coast. It felt like Christmas. I was so giddy I actually had a hard time falling back asleep, but somehow, somehow, I persevered. I know. I'm amazing.

Actually, the whole morning was quite dramatic.

5:27 a.m. My alarm clock went off at the usual time and instead of my normal routine (which involves some intense snooze button action and a lot of cursing of the morning), I hopped out of bed and ran to the window. You see, I had been harboring some hope for a snow day, but was too afraid to jinx the possibility. I even wore my pjs inside out.

5:29 a.m. After determining that it was indeed shitty outside, I ran to my computer (which I had conveniently stowed next to the bed for an immediate update on the weather...I said I was afraid to ˆjinxˆ my snow day, I didn't say I was afraid to ˆmonitorˆit. Big diff.

5:30 a.m. I scoured several news websites and...nothing. Damn.

5:35 a.m. I checked my school's website. Nothing. Damn. Maybe I should take a shower? Am I (gasp!) going to brave the elements?

5:50 a.m. I'm out of the shower and back on the computer.

5:51 a.m. I check the news website for school closings. Damn.

5:52 a.m. I check my school's website. Damn.

5:53 a.m. I take a moment to stew in my own anger. Every school district around my house is closed. Every school district around my school is closed. WTF? What are we? Mailmen? I don't remember taking that oath...

5:54 a.m. I check the weather. It says it is going to snow all afternoon. We might get 10 to 12 inches. And sleet, don't forget the sleet.

5:55 a.m. I realize that, after my hour long commute which necessitates several forms of transportation, no one is going to be waiting for me at the door with a trophy. And, I will most likely only be greeted by a list of names of co-workers (who live much much closer) who have called out.

5:56 a.m. That's it. I'm calling out. I open a word document and begin to write sub plans. I open up my cell phone and scroll to find my school's absentee number.

And then....

5:57 a.m. I receive a text message from above. (Actually it was from one of my Super Colleagues, but whatever.) SCHOOL IS CLOSED!!

I leaped up in the air. I wrote several aggressive text messages back to my Super Colleague demanding to know her sources. After all, I want to be d-bag who doesn't show up for work claiming, "I thought we had a snow day." And of course, my cynicism is unfounded. She is right and we are free.

6:00 a.m. I run to the bathroom, put my pjs on (still inside out, just in case) and jump back into bed.

6:15 a.m. I'm still awake. Too excited to sleep.

6:30 a.m. I begin counting backwards from 100...

8:30 a.m. I wake up.

Skipping down the stairs, I made a lovely breakfast for Mr. Mimi and I to actually eat TOGETHER. I linger over my morning coffee, blogs and TV. I change into real clothes around 11.

And then...

Mr. Mimi and I decide to take advantage of his home office day, and my snow day and get our taxes done. I know, it doesn't sound like very much fun to me either, but it needs to get done and I love crossing things off my list. So we go.

The person preparing our taxes (who was a VERY loud talker by the way) said, "Lucky you, with the day off. Teachers always want a day off...never want to work."

Um, hello? Drive-by! Who do you think you are, person who really only works during tax season? First of all, who doesn't want a bonus day off every now and then? Second of all, snow days are one of the bonuses of being a teacher...just like expense accounts, squashy office chairs and unmonitored bathroom breaks are the bonuses of other people's jobs. Let me have my bonus please. And third of all, screw you for insinuating that teachers never want to work. Just screw you.

As I opened my mouth to let her have it, Mr. Mimi (recognizing the signs of an impending explosion...hey, he's been around awhile) quickly made a joke and changed the subject.

She was lucky he was there...

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